Note: I wrote the majority of this yesterday afternoon. I was in a horrible spot, emotionally speaking. That’s the thing with depression…when you’re in a depressive episode (these can last anywhere from days to months), you have bad days and ‘not so bad’ days. Today (after the first few hours) for me is a ‘not so bad’ day…yesterday was…yesterday was downright horrible, and I wrote this in the middle of that.
I’m writing this first as a document in Word, because I am not sure it will ever see the “Publish” button on my blog. I don’t know if I need to publish it, or if I need to just let my breaking heart vomit it out in a massive vent. Also, in case I do publish this, please be advised that there’s really not a lot of optimism or hope here. I’m holding on to what little amounts of both I have left, I don’t want to purge it with the negativity.
With that said…here we go. Continue reading